Confessions of a Coffee Snob

I admit it, I’m a snob. I've tried not to be. Yet I stand before you a self confirmed coffee snob. How bad am I you might wonder? Every morning at work, there is a fresh pot of coffee made just down the hall from me in my principal’s office. In a new school, the proper thing to do would be to graciously accept this offer, which I've tried. I really did. But Folgers? And then they even had a Kona blend. A blend? I’m sorry. I tried, but I just couldn't. Pretty bad, huh? It gets worse. I can't drink from a styrofoam cup. Why ruin a perfectly good cup of coffee by putting it in sytrofoam? Yuck. I'm even particular about which mug I use. No one or two finger mugs, please. And it's not enough that it's a three or four finger mug; it must also have the right balance. (Keep in mind that the balance changes when it's full.) Here are two of my favorites. The blue one is just perfect. The Bush/Cheney one is fun because I'm the lone conservative in a world of liberal educators! And to top it off, I LOVE our coffee maker (thanks Mom): a Cuisinart Grind & Brew with a thermal carafe. I have it set so that as I walk in from the gym each morning, a fresh pot is waiting. A perfect way to start the day. I just realized that by admitting this none of you that know me will ever offer me coffee again. :(

It’s my father-in-law’s fault (pictured at right). He created this in me. I always enjoyed coffee but he taught me to love it. I can't blame him for the snob part though. Following his death, I inherited his coffee roaster and started buying green coffee online.

I remember when he introduced me to the fine art of roasting coffee beans. He proudly escorted his brother-in-law, Claude, and me outside to give us our first roasting lesson in his mother’s garage. He was still roasting beans with a hot air popcorn popper at the time. More exciting than the lesson itself was his joy in what he was doing; in his sharing this with us. It’s a vivid memory I hold of a wonderful man, and a wonderful time. It obviously had an impact on Claude too as he is a fellow roaster today!

I also have to confess, the snob that I am, I’m not a purist. Try as I have, I cannot drink my coffee black. I must have my Coffee-mate and Splenda. I am so addicted to drinking my coffee that way, I rarely order coffee at restaurants unless I bring my stash bag with me. My mother even keeps a small container of Coffee-mate and packets of Splenda because of my compulsion. I still can’t believe I had gone three months without coffee when first confronted with my health scare because I was avoiding the Coffee-mate. That was definitely the hardest part of my restricted meal plan. Since my condition has greatly improved, I've allowed coffee back in. And it has been wonderful. :)

Just in case I've stimulated any interest in roasting here, are my two favorite sites. You'll find everything you need to get started. The Coffee Project has a great online video section with roasting demos, coffee history, and production. Coffee Bean Corral has a great coffee matrix to use to compare different types of coffee.